Updated: Jan 5, 2021
“I knew I should have…” How many times have you said this to yourself? You have an inner voice that is always trying to guide you toward fulfilling your greatest dreams. It’s like a compass set for your highest good, but you usually dismiss it. Wouldn’t it be nice to consistently pay attention to that deep guidance within so you can stop regretting your decisions and create an extraordinary life?
Even if you have almost everything you want, you may still feel unfulfilled. Maybe you want to make a change but don’t have a clear direction. You might feel disconnected from your purpose or from the people in your life. Maybe you’re just living on autopilot. If you can relate to these, you have lost touch with your inner compass.
3 Habits that Lead to Regret
1. Tuning out
Tuning out your feelings may start as a coping strategy but as you work on creating the life you want, it becomes a big obstacle. You stop being real. You were taught that you need to be positive and get rid of anything “negative.” But when you put a lid on your feelings, they don’t go away. They form internal landmines that can come out in spurts of anger, sadness or over-reactivity. They continue to get louder until you pay attention to them.
Feelings carry a message that needs to be heard, not rejected. When you are honest about how you feel, you will know exactly where you stand. This self-awareness is the first step in reconnecting to your inner guidance. No matter what it is that you need to acknowledge, facing it will enable you to stay centered and grounded.
When you pretend that you are fine for so long, you may lose your ability to tell the difference between your pretense and your intuition. That is because they are both talking to you! You have so many voices in your head that you don't know what to listen to. You become lost in a labyrinth of mixed messages.
When this happens you can default into a trance-like state where you just put up with things for years. You may stay in a toxic work environment, repeat the same frustrating patterns with your partner, or feel chronically overwhelmed without resolving the situation. There is usually a benefit you are getting such as making money or avoiding conflict. You may not realize how much you are sacrificing in order to hold on to that benefit.
You can stop sleepwalking through life. You can learn to discern the difference between your higher guidance and your old agendas. When you do, you will stop doubting yourself and find the next step on your soul’s path.
3. Being Indecisive
Are you stuck on the fence, afraid to make the wrong decision about something? If so, the first step is to determine what type of pain you are experiencing.
There are two kinds of pain, and it is vital to know the difference:
1- The pain that is caused by something that is damaging
2- The pain that is caused by stretching out of your comfort zone
If you are exercising and something starts to hurt, first you need to determine whether the pain is due to an injury or caused by the process of building new muscles. If it is due to an injury, continuing to exercise will cause damage. If it comes from building new muscles, continuing to exercise will cause growth.
This also applies to emotional pain. If you feel stuck in a relationship, is it because it is destructive for you? Or is it because you are avoiding facing some issues that would come up no matter what relationship you were in?
It is important to determine what type of pain you are experiencing. Then you will know whether you need to end something or embrace a stretch. This will give you the courage to choose a direction and commit to it.
The Path to Extraordinary Living
Your divine guidance has always been there, even though it may have become a faint echo. Reconnecting with it is like plugging in to a source of internal clarity and power. You are able to tap into your soul’s vision and direction.
Listening to your divine guidance is the key to living an extraordinary life. You will consecrate your path and live with purpose, connection and deep joy.
*This is an excerpt from my chapter in the book Soulful Leadership. It will be published on January 21, 2020.